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Post by Kat on Dec 20, 2008 0:08:01 GMT -5
Rawr. Greetings everyone...
Ok. I began writing a novel and I would like to share it with everyone on this site. Please read, and critique! I love constructive criticism. Also if you have any ideas for it, just let me know! Its a fantasy fiction novel. ^^
Enjoy.
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Post by Kat on Dec 20, 2008 0:08:34 GMT -5
CHAPTER 1
A rave, drinks, and some introductions
A tall teen around 19 leaned against a wall in a dimly lit night club. Neon lights were flashing and the techno beat was impossible to resist, positive vibes could be felt from all around. The bartender, Kadaz, was doing his thing enchanting the drinkers with his skill and the DJ kept the rave going.
With an exasperated sigh the teen left his spot on the wall and sauntered over to the bar, taking a seat next to his buddy Daniel, “Hey Bro. What’s wrong? Tonight doesn’t seem like your night tonight…” The boy nodded his head and gestured to Daniel, “Yeah, I’ve been off lately. It’s killing my mood.” Daniel just chuckled, “It might help if you went on dates more often, Tanner.”
Tanner rolled his eyes, “I would go on dates except that those damn vampires are always snagging the cute ones. They deserve a taste of their own medicine.” He growled, curling his hands into fists. Daniel ran a hand through his wavy auburn hair, “I know what you mean…I would do something if we could do it legally and without getting kicked out of the club.” Tanner nodded his head in agreement, “Other than that, how have you been Daniel?” Daniel looked at his empty glass, “Oh, I’ve been good I guess. I’m stuck in the same ship as you, as far as dating goes…”
Tanner let out another sigh and ordered a Mai Tai, his favorite. A few minutes later a small, slender female and a man dressed in maroon joined Tanner and Daniel at the bar. “Hey Az, Irael. How’ve you guys been? I haven’t seen you in a long time.” He waved at the two as they sat down.
Irael dipped his wide brimmed fedora and wrapped an arm around Az’s waist, holding her close. “Yes, it has been a while Tanner. I hope your trouble with the government has been cleared up for the most part.” He grinned widely, flashing his fangs and two rows of normal teeth. Az looked at Tanner, “We’ve been good; dodging society like everyone else here.” She chirped, giggling slightly. Tanner smiled a little and took another sip from his glass, “That’s good.” He paused for a minute, “I saw you guys out on the dance floor; you look great together.” Az blushed slightly and leaned into Irael, “You should get out there more often. You’re such a wallflower Tanner.” Az replied, looking back out to the dance floor.
Az pulled away from Irael and stood up, “Be right back Irael; I’m going to find these two gentlemen some girls to dance with.” She smiled and practically skipped over to the bright tiled floor, socializing with some of the girls who would be good candidates. The three men laughed quietly and waited for Az to return.
No more than 10 minutes later, Az returned with two young girls; they were complete alter images of each other. The girl on Az’s right was well dressed and looked rich by the looks of it. The girl on her left was the complete opposite, she was small and looked delicate and wore old clothes very similar to Tanner’s sleeveless t-shirt, jeans, and vandalized old converse ensemble.
Az smiled brightly with pride as the girl on her right stepped forward towards Daniel, extending a hand, “Name is Brooke, how about it good looking? Wanna dance?” She smiled smugly and Daniel took her hand; he was pulled onto the dance floor and they both starting dancing.
The other girl cautiously walked over to Daniel’s old seat. Az motioned to Irael, “I guess we’ll leave you two to bond with each other then. Tootles!” She grabbed Irael’s arm and pulled him over to a secluded table so they could talk. Tanner and the girl sat there for a few more minutes before she turned to him, hesitating for a moment, “I-I think you’re the most gorgeous guy I have ever seen and I want to know if you want to dance? Otherwise I’m ditching this place, no one wants to talk to me and it’s pointless being here.” She bit her lip nervously and watched Tanner.
He smiled and nodded his head, standing up and offering his hand, “I can’t resist, let’s dance.” The girl eagerly took his hand and he instinctively wrapped and arm around her waist. They went to the back of the crowd as the music slowed and the DJ, a demon named Beau with a veggie fetish, changed the mood from hyper to relaxing. Tanner swayed from side to side slowly, “what’s your name?” He queried, the girl rested her head on his shoulder, “My name is Naimi Thompson, and I’m 18…” She murmured, “what’s your name?” She asked after a moment, “My name is Tanner Jordan. You can call me whatever you want.” He rested his other arm on her shoulder, a quiet purring noise coming from his chest.
Naimi pulled away and looked at his chest, “Is that you?” She tilted her head, eyebrows creasing. He chuckled, “Yes…I guess I’ll have to tell you sometime.” He trailed off, “Tell me what Tanner?” He looked at her, his emerald eyes boring into her grey ones, “My ability…” he sighed, “I’m like a werewolf, except that I transform into a black lion; and I’m a lot furrier and fuzzier.” Naimi looked down at the floor, “I-I like fur and fuzz.” She admitted blushing, “Will you be my kitten?”
Tanner smiled, holding her close, “Anything for you.” He purred once more. Naimi made an attempt at mimicking but it turned out to sound more like a hacking noise than a content cat purr. “I’m not a kitty like you…” She giggled, Tanner kissed her forehead, “That’s alright; it’s the thought that counts.” He mused, “If you don’t mind me asking, what is your ability? It’d only be fair if you told me since I told you mine.”
Chapter 2
Confessions
Naimi pulled away from Tanner, on the verge of tears and trembling. “I don’t have an ability…I’m just a human.” She shook a little. Tanner stared at her in shock, after a moment he found his voice and spoke, “W-well…That is surprising.” She looked at him, “You’re going to leave me aren’t you?” She took another step back, fighting back tears. Tanner shook his head and held out his arms, “I won’t ever walk out on you like people did to me, just because you’re different from me…It doesn’t mean anything to me, we can work this out.”
Naimi’s tears spilled over and she ran into Tanner’s arms burying her face in his chest. He hugged her and held her close, “I’m here for you and I won’t ever leave you…” He nuzzled her cheek. Naimi moved her head away from his chest and looked around the room, some people nearby had heard Naimi’s confession and had stopped dancing or drinking, gawking at her. Several whispers could be heard such as “A human?! She’ll ruin us!!” or “A filthy human in here?! How the hell did she get past Miles??”
Naimi bit her lip and looked at Tanner, “T-tanner, they’re staring at me.” She clutched his shirt, Tanner looked at the crowd and bared his teeth, “Didn’t your damn mothers teach you that staring is rude?! Go back to your damn dancing and liquor, you monsters!” He growled, tightening his grip on her. “Maybe we should go outside if things get too heated.” Tanner whispered. Naimi shook her head, “N-no. I’ll just leave, I’m just causing trouble.” She started pulling away from Tanner again.
Tanner sighed and loosened his grip, “Please don’t leave…Don’t walk out on me like everyone else.” He paused for a moment, “I want to show you something; come on.” Naimi nodded her head and followed Tanner outside.
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